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“Be Perfect or Be Your Best”

By Pam Solberg-Tapper on February 13, 2011

One of my executive coaching clients has been struggling with perfectionism. She strives for the impossible and disappoints herself when she does not achieve it. This caused her tremendous stress leading to feelings of guilt and failure when things did not turn out as she expected.

She realized that her perfectionism made her rigid and caused her angst. Through our coaching, she discovered a more empowering perspective which is to be her “best” versus trying to be “perfect”. Being her best was attainable while being perfect was not.

With her new strategy of operating from the perspective of being her best, she is able to let go of judging herself and is freed from the restraints of perfectionism. She’s pleased knowing that “being her best” is her “best self”.

Here are some traits of perfectionism:

  • Unrealistic expectations of yourself and others
  • Continuously trying to refine a project even when the stakes are low
  • Criticism derails you
  • Excessive focus on mistakes
  • Fear of failure
  • Negative self talk 

Here are some ways to temper perfectionism

  • Strive to be your best in a situation versus being perfect
  • Set realistic expectations and flexible time frames for the achievement of goals
  • Use mistakes as learning opportunities versus judging yourself
  • Avoid spending excessive amount of time on low payoff tasks
  • Monitor “all or nothing” thinking 

Are you a perfectionist?

Try this informative quiz from About.com:  Quiz: Are You a Perfectionist? 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~  Linkedin  ~ 218-340-3330

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Meet this Blog’s Co-Hosts

Pam Solberg-Tapper is a highly experienced Professional Certified Coach. Her company, Coach for Success, designs, implements and coaches in a variety of leadership and executive programs.
[Read more ...]


Carter McNamara of Authenticity Consulting, LLC, has 20 years of experience providing one-on-one and group coaching around the world. [Read more ...]

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