You Don’t Want to Be Successful

The Big Lie

There’s a big lie you’re telling yourself.  Not to worry, you’re not alone.  Many of us are telling ourselves the same lie.  The lie is that you want to be successful.

But the vast majority of us don’t want to be successful.  Not really.  What we do want is to be fulfilled.  We want to be flooded with joy in our work and our play, challenged to our limits, living in great abundance, and knowing that we had the courage to create it.

Success vs. Fulfillment

Success and fulfillment aren’t mutually exclusive.  And, in fact, they may well look the same from the outside.  But they come from very different places.

The path of success is extrinsically motivated (doing because you think you should), while the path of fulfillment is intrinsically motivated (doing because, when you listen carefully, your heart tells you that you must).

The missing ingredient for most people who are successful, but not fulfilled?  They have an idea — uniquely theirs — lurking in the depths of their soul that they have never brought to light, and on which they have never taken action.

3 Steps to Move from Success to Fulfillment

A vast majority of leaders have awesome Big Ideas.  And, many Big Ideas die with their creators because the path of success somehow feels safer than the path of fulfillment.  But, the best kept secret?

Once you make an unequivocal decision to honor within yourself the choices that fulfill you, the life force that is tapped swamps the draw of perceived safety that mere success dangles in front of us.

Is it time to move from success to fulfillment and bring your Big Leadership Idea into the light?

Step 1: Ask the Big Question.

Be willing to ask yourself, “Is this it?  Am I doing what I’m here to do?” and then challenge yourself to sit still long enough to listen for the response.  There is a still, quiet voice in each of us that knows the answer.  The more respect you give it, the louder it will speak.

Step 2: Have the Courage to Act.

Being willing to release who you are in order to stretch into who you are becoming takes a lion’s courage.  There’s part in each of us that will valiantly protect the status quo – “C’mon… why rock the boat?  This isn’t all that bad is it?  I mean I [pick one: get paid well, have the right house, drive the right car], right?  Can the grass really be any greener elsewhere?” But the status quo impacts your spirit the way a room without oxygen impacts your body.  It’s only going to stay alive so long before there’s nothing left to breathe. 

Step 3: Embrace the Hard Stuff.

“Hard stuff” is the stuff shines a spotlight on the areas of yourself that are begging to be ‘scrubbed up’ so that you can evolve as an leader, as a manager, and as a person.  It is the gremlin of scarcity that coaches you not to do it.  It is the voice of the reptilian brain that beckons you to stay small.  It is the insecurity that drives you to say ‘yes’ to any opportunity, instead of having the courage to say ‘no’ unless it is the right opportunity.

The ‘hard stuff’ is just a collection of opportunities disguised as challenges.  Instead of avoiding them, embrace them and….well, let the games begin!

It’s as easy as that…. 1…. 2…. 3…..

One response to “You Don’t Want to Be Successful”

  1. People avoid the uncertain and the strange. Success is stranger to most of us. Although people proclaim that they aim for success, they are afraid of it because they do not know it.

    This is why the celebration of small successes is important. We need to know the taste of success in small amounts to truly desire having it in full.

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